I love when people randomly follow me because I assume they’ve just seen something I said and went “ah yes. This nerd seems particularly strange. Let’s see what else it does”
- baby: s..s-...s
- sister: aw are you trying to say sister?
- baby: Space: the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five-year mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before.
HOW DO PEOPLE EMAIL TEACHERS SO QUICKLY I SIT THERE FOR 1 HOUR TRYING TO WORK OUT WHETHER TO START OFF WITH HI OR HELLO
"When we did the Mouth of Truth scene, which is that monument in Rome and the legend is if you dare to put your hand in the Mouth of Truth, if you’ve lied, it’ll bite your hand off. But we had that little scene to do, and I remember an old bit that Red Skelton used to do. When he’d shake hands with somebody, he’d come like that [saying that, Gregory hides his hand in his sleeve]. Well, I said on the side, to Willy Wyler, ‘Well, supposing I spring that on Audrey when I put my hand in the Mouth of Truth. Is it too corny, too awful?’ he said, ‘Oh no, do it, let’s see her reaction. But don’t tell her you’re gonna do it’. So I put my hand in there and then when I brought it out, well Audrey just screamed and went bonkers and it was a wonderful, spontaneous moment. That was only one take." Gregory Peck
honestly my favorite thing ive ever made in photoshop is catloaf
my graphic arts teacher hung it on the wall in the ga computer lab
i’m all for boys wearing makeup mostly because if more of them got into it there’d be a bigger market and it wouldn’t cost $25 for an eyeshadow primer anymore
i can’t wait to go into the makeup aisle to get the latest man-color of guyshadow that comes in containers shaped like bullets and footballs
"Bruh I just went to sephora and got the sickest shade of eyeshadow"
"Sick dude what’s it called"
"Monster truck gas fumes"
When you go to a haunted house, it may seem like you’re being funny by trying to scare the actors or jump out at them when you go through a second time, but guess what? ITS NOT FUNNY.
You pay us to scare you. It is your choice to go, so don’t fucking go through if you’re going to ignore the rules and get too close to the actors as a ‘joke’.
These bruises happened because over the course of 4 hours, several people ignored the instructions that CLEARLY stated that they were to wait in the front room until told otherwise. Rather than listen, they ran into the next room and slammed into me- effectively throwing me into the wall. This didn’t only happen once. It happened ten times at LEAST.
Then we had this asshole who thought that once I ‘died’ for the haunt, he could pretend to kick me to see if I’d moved. I, being used to people abusing me- jumped back and slammed my head into the concrete wall.
YOU ARE NOT FUNNY BY BEING RUDE AT A HAUNTED HOUSE. WE ARE PAID ACTORS THAT YOU CHOOSE TO COME AND SEE PERFORM. YOU PAY US TO SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF YOU, SO DONT HIT US WHEN WE DO
I feel that this is relevant considering it is October and more Haunted Houses are opening up. I know it seems funny to scare the ‘monsters’ but all you do is hurt real people. So stop.
It’s not even October but I’m still spreading this
SIGNAL BOOOOOOOOSSSSSTTTTT!!!!!!! Now
when u sneeze in front of your pet and they look like you’ve just offended their great ancestors
GREATEST IMPROVISED LINE EVER
People still buy these ugly disgusting things. Even when I tell them about the animals that died for their ugly boots they don’t care.
I don’t agree with ugg boots but this is actually bullshit.
1. Lamb marking (cutting off tails) is done so that the sheep doesnt get flyblown when summer comes. Flyblown is where flies lay their eggs near the anus of a sheep, when they hatch maggots eat at the inside of the sheep colon, infesting it with bacteria which can eventually kill them, slowly and very painfully.
2. Shearing does not injure a sheep, I don’t know about other countries but I’m sure its the same as Australia when if you do not shear them, they DO eventually become flyblown.
3. You CANNOT use wool if it has been contaminated by BLOOD. It cannot be skirted out like poo and urine does by the roustabouts.
4. Once a sheep has had its ‘throat slit’ it cannot be sheared for the same reason as 3. It has no advantage for anyone by killing their livestock if they are in the wool industry.
I don’t care about your decision to hate ugg boots, you probably don’t give a flying shit about mine but DO NOT spread this bullshit information when the wool industry does not work that way.
Peta and their bullshit
You do not have to condone woollen clothing (if you’re vegan/simply disagree with animals being used by humans for clothing even if they are not harmed by the process) but for the love of god don’t resort to slinging misinformation around to get your point across, damn.
we used to take care of a herd of sheep on the farm when i was a kid and all of this is true i can’t tell you how many sheep i’ve seen being sheared like you don’t skin them to get the wool they’re still very much alive afterwards do not spread this ‘ruthless cruelty’ bullshit around please and thank you
Vampire doctors that can smell if you have a blood disease.
Werewolf therapy animals for sick kids.
Nature sprite and nymph nurses that always make sure people have pretty flowers to brighten up their white rooms.
Fauns that go around and sing and dance for patients so that they smile.
Nice monster hospitals would be amazing
Someone write a book about this.